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Showing posts from January, 2001

Jimmy Dean

Jimmy Dean
Thanks for the many kind words from perfect strangers stopping by this site. I am still knee deep in e-mail responses to people, I do know. I have got to work on my pen pal skills. This reminds me of a funny note I received once but first a little background. Names have been changed to protect the guilty. When I was in 9th grade, some jerk (we'll call him Jimmy Dean) tried to get me to fight him during lunch at school. Fisticuffs and everything. Now having just taken a summers worth of karate lessons, I could have turned him into a pretzel and handed him his spleen. However, my pacifist upbringing at work, I decided that fighting was not the answer. As I turned away from Jimmy, he punched me in the eye as I turned away. He hit me hard enough that I saw a flash of light and heard a crack. As it turns out Jimmy had fractured my eye, BEHIND THE EYEBALL. This trapped a small piece of my eye muscle causing me to have double vision for a few weeks. I saw more optometrists, …

site updates

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New look, new loot
Yeah, not really. I did update my bio page with a thinger that looks like a filmstrip and I thought it looked cool. Whatever. Clicking on the pictures gives you webcam shots from oldest to newest. Play away. I am trying to keep the cam on more these days so that you may catch me looking more stoned looking (not really Mom) than ever before. The about page now has a story involving drinking, childbirth and war tales. It was emailed to me by a relative of the actor Stephen Shellen or should I say Schellenberg as you will find out if you read this AMAZING TRUE STORY! Not a good day to be reading this site as a non-Shellen. Check back tomorrow, I might say something of substance then.
I should have packed the chains
Word on the street is that there is snow on top of the Sunol Grade my normal route home from the office. Yikes!

xml question

One for the geeks
Anyone know how to (or if there is) an easy (ha,ha) way to parse XML on Apache/1.2.4 PHP/FI-2.0 running on Linux? To make matters worse this is a shared machine, therefore I don't have root level access. Seriously, if you know please email me. Thanks.

re design

Most of the archives are back... now what the hell happened to the colors
I have been toying with a redesign and this is not it. It is a redesign but not a complete one. Oh forget it I am going to bed, I'll explain later.

site errors

There is nothing wrong with your set...
First the kind gent that runs the free comments database for this site , BlogVoices, announced that he was terminating the service due to server troubles and now my archives are a bit out of wack. I will try and get this fixed as soon as possible. Ev and PB have sent me a possible fix, but until I get a few moments to do this you will have to make do with recent history. Take a pill or lie down or something in the meanwhile.

Update, update, update.

Poor form
From Whim and Vinegar Opinions article on Joining the Weblog Nation: Update, update, update. Try to add something every day, even if it's only one paragraph. Be disciplined. Some days will be better than others, but if you get into the habit of updating, you'll find that doing it daily is easier. So my question is, does this post count?

More points are better right?

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I just signed up for traffic school to clear my run-in with the law off my driving record. I could have signed up for the normal variety of traffic school but alas good judgement went by the wayside and I signed up for the Pizza For You With Comedians Too school. Now with a name like this you would assume that: Humor will be present (although it may be hard to stomach at 7:45am on a Saturday morning in February) Pizza will be consumed However, my past experiences with such traffic schools (I have been twice before), is that this is not usually the case. Usually you get some poor guy trying out his (rarely funny) material before a very unwelcome audience and then they phone for pizza or have someone from the class make a pizza run. The pizza is mostly the cardboard crust with a good dose of grease variety pizza. I am far from the smartest business man on the planet but I think this is a deeply flawed business idea. To make grumpy traffic offenders laugh on a Saturday morn…

Don't believe the hype: Forwarded email strikes again

Don't believe the hype
This post is for my godmother (God bless her) and everyone else who sends me forwarded email that are just recycled urban legends. Take a gander at how this stuff gets out of control over at Wired. By the way, if you are ever in doubt about a piece of email you have received, clear it with the Hoaxbusters site or at Symantec's Anti-Virus Hoax Center.

Caffeine + fiend = Caffiend

I haven't had coffee in about a month. My drink of choice is a non-fat double latte with sugar in the raw. It normally costs about as much as lunch at a fast food joint. I should really quit for good and buy myself a houseboat with the savings.When I got sick before Christmas I stopped drinking coffee and started drinking teas that have cute, puffy names to soothe my throat. Names like "Lemon Lift", "Orange Herbal Essence", and "Sleepytime Tea". I am slowly making the switch over to more manly sounding tea names before I make the switch back to coffee. I am drinking "Earl Grey", "Darjeeling" and "English Teatime". That last one doesn't quite have that manly quality to it. I am going to rename it "British Conquest of the Americas" or "Redcoat Revelry". In any case, I feel like a smoker that knows they need to quit but can't because they are fully addicted.Attention large drug companies, how abou…
Rave 'til Dawn
I've had to take a break from the non-stop rave in my headphones. After about 3 consecutive spins of the Gutter disc, I could hear the music playing in my head for almost HALF A DAY! The worst part is that on this disc Macy Gray and Jim Morrison are sampled on a few tracks. I don't like Macy Gray's solo work, nor am I a big Doors fan, so hearing both of these people churning in my subconscious for nearly 12 hours was a bit harrowing. I understand that Caterina has been having a similar problem. "Techno" or electronic music has been getting me in hot water for a long time. When I was 19, I had a mix tape made by a friend with a bunch of the latest techno songs. On one side was this compilation CD called Rave 'til Dawn. It had that horrible 2Unlimited song, Lords of Acid and some Praga Kahn stuff. The other side was "Kaos Theory" (which is no longer in print). Anyway, it was all high bpm stuff. Perfect driving music right? Well I t…
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Pixelated you.
Always wanted to see what you would look like as a pixel person? That is supposed to be me on the left there. I couldn't decide between the jeans and sweater or the shear dress but good taste won that battle. Visit www.stor.co.uk and create your own "avatar". Apparently, it's all the rage in the UK. Crazy Brits.
[Link via MeFi]
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Get 'em while their hot
Local boy and jazz guitarist Charlie Hunter has just released another volume of mp3's at his website. They are available here. Hunter is one of the few artist who "gets" this whole mp3 thing. Not only does he create excitement by releasing rare live recordings as "volumes" but he also provides album artwork for those who chose to burn this onto a CD. Props to Mr.Hunter. Be prepared for long download times as this edition just became available. I will have to say it is well worth the wait. I was present for the recording of track 2 at the Kuumbwa Jazz center in Santa Cruz on January 20, 1997. It's Hunter playing with the now defunct TJ Kirk. It was great then and a rare treat to hear now. Get it now![Edited 1/11/01: Please note: Although tracks 2 and 3 will make you want to dance in your cubicle, I cannot be held responsible for your dismissal for this behavior.]
No stinking badges
I am missing two of the biggest computer shows around right now, Macworld in SF and the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. For the first time in about 6 years I didn't hear Steve Jobs give the opening address at MacWorld SF. I did get to listen to it on the radio on the drive in to work. What a speaker/salesman that Jobs is. As the commentator on CNET Radio put it, "He can still sell icecubes to Eskimos". It's true. As a marketing/web/biz dev guy I have long appreciated the Jobs/Apple philosophy of taking care of customers, creating a mystique beyond the box and truly delivering on promises. Strangely I have never owned a Mac. I have marketed and designed products for Macs. I have used Macs at design agencies I have worked for but have never parted with actual paychecks to own one. I am sure this means something but I am not quite sure what at this point.
The pinnacle of computing
Let's say we all ditch desks and buy La-Z-Boy WebTV e-cliners. [Link via usr/bin/girl]
Hi mind if we come around and yank your phone out of the wall?
Computing is odd isn't it. I am sure if you have had an email address for longer than a year you have received the If Microsoft made cars... joke. It mainly ilustrates the fact that reliability is not something you can count on with computers. Yesterday, the good folks at ATT@Home rang me up and asked if they could do a simple swap out of my existing cable modem for a newer model free of charge. I said ok and they sent a service guy over pronto. On a Sunday! I was impressed. I was not impressed when the gent they sent over took 2 hours, tried another modem and still couldn't get my service back up. I said "Hey, how about you leave the old one here until you guys figure out what went wrong?" and the service guy said "Sorry. We can't do that. We already killed your account." Cripes. It is still not up and I fully expect it to be down when I arrive at home later. This got me wondering wha…
Bling, bling baby!
Whenever I am in a designerly mood I throw on the headphones and listen to a lot of electronica and hip hop. Lately I have listened to so much that I fear my heartrate will permanently get stuck up in the 130 bpm range. I gotta cool off. (Incidentally, look for a fresh look on shellen.com in the next few weeks. All the cool kids are redesigning for 2001 and I don't want to be behind the curve.) On a good note, I have been listening to Fatboy Slim's Halfway Between the Gutter and the Stars which is a good party album, but this one, On The Floor At The Boutique, is even better. You can almost feel the walls of The Boutique in Brighton pulse when he spins Michael Jackson. "Michael Jackson, now look what you've done." I have also been listening to a great 2-disc set that is part of the Global Underground series. This one is by Sasha, Vol. 9 : Live in SF and will cause much rump shakin'. While still on the musical tip, get your bootie over to
Ah, vertical again!
Yes, I have rejoined the land of the living. Upper respiratory infection, sinus infection, fever, and chills were the order of the day there for a good 4 days that I spent horizontally. I thought I might have to have a chest X-ray but was given a clean bill of health finally this weekend. Yay for antibiotics. Illness limited the new years activities to sparkling cider at midnight and watching cable. It felt fitting to have the year that roared in like a lion go out like a mouse. I can honestly say I hope to never see 2000 again. Good riddance. I hope everyone has a more prosperous and stable year in aught one.